5:40 a.m.

MAT What a bad movie. [Nice review, jack ass! - editor] GREG This movie is a lot more boring than it's name would suggest. Lots of talking and stuff, not a whole lot of Paris eating. I feel somewhat disappointed. I am also wide awake without an inkling of tiredness. I think I fell asleep for about 10 minutes. I have been vanquished. I give this movie 1.5 MRU's out of 5 3 hate points ZACK Good start, 2 French people died within the first 2 minutes. OK, 50 minutes later, and no one else has died. It's just Napolean from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, being about as assertive as Mat. I'm really disappointed in Mat. Greg has also fallen vistim to the oh so comfortable "chair of sleep". It looks like there are only 2 real men still among us. OK, I've made a decision. This movie sucks. I'm pissed off at what passes for a "cult classic" in Hollywood Video. Terrible. 1 out of 5 Quality Points 6 hate points out of 10 Zack's Caffeine Frenzy Soda Review!!! White Lightnin' Grape Jolt This doesn't taste too bad at all. Best of all, it has an over-abundance of glorious, glorious caffeine. 7 out of 10 RICH Speaking of eating, I ate Mat's sister. I'm not seeing many Paris-eating cars, as Zack says there is. This Sucks. Greg, not sleeping now. Zack and I are the only ones left on this Planet of the Apes. Rations running low. Paris cars I hate all Australians. The spiked car = cool and impaled a french guy. 0 out of 5 Hogans But I can't hate Zack, look what he did to Mat. But I do hate his decision. 3 Hate Points.