AN ARTICLE BY: Zack Huffman
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          How many times have you been just sitting there, watching T.V., when a movie trailer comes on that reveals a plot twist or two. Allow me to re-phrase that. How many times doesn't that happen? Maybe once, twice a year? It's not like they're doing this with movies, that dont' really contain plot twists either. Movies that are supposed to contain a bunch of twists, are having everyone of them revealed in the nationally syndicated commericial, that most people will see at least twenty times before they actually bother to watch the piece of crap movie. Look at the movie Anti-Trust. It was supposed to be a crazy plot-twisting thriller. Aside from the fact that it completely sucked, every single plot twist was revealed in the trailer. That's actually what the whole trailer consisted of. spoilers.
           The movie spoilers don't end with thrillers either. Traditionally, comedy movies now show every funny part worth watching, in the trailer. In Dude Where's My Car, they showed the best jokes of the movie in the trailer. Of course, when I say "Best Jokes", I'm refering to ones that ONLY made me want to kill the people involved with the production of the "movie", and not the President, who should have had them killed in the first place. In the Nutty Professor 2, the trailer ruins what Mat called the "funniest gag." Of course this so called "funniest gag" featured a man getting raped my a giant hamster, as he is suddenly singing soprano. You know, because being sodomized makes your voice raise a few octaves. I guess that's why all of the sopranos in my high school chorus, were all suck ass freaks, but thats a whole other story.
           It doesn't end there either. Cartoon movie that are directed more toward children, are also taking zero effort in hiding the ending of the movie, only this time, there's a narrator to tell what happens, in case some dumb little kid still doesn't get it. Take "Lady and the Tramp 2 : Scamp's adventure.After introducing the story, the narrarator tells about how it ends happy. I guess I can understand a parents wanting to make sure they get their kids a good movie, but what's the point of getting these movies, when the whole story is revealed in the trailer itself?
           Sadly, Troma has even had a problem with all too revealing trailers. In the trailer for their fantastic masterpiece "Terror Firmer", they show a scene where Casey has been burned, is wearing a dress, and is wielding a large knife. That happens to be from the climax of the movie, and the trailer ruins the surprise ending. Though, in Troma's defense they have some of the best movie trailers in existance, even if they reveal too much of their in-house productions, I always get an urge to watch a Troma movie after seeing it's trailer.
           I guess all of this comes down to the fact that nobody really wants to be surprised from a movie anymore. The movie companies in America have collectively lobotimized the American public, in the hopes of making more money, with out all of that effort thing to worry about. I happened to see "Unbreakable" in a some what packed theater about half a year ago. The trailer for that was a bit vague, at best. I had no idea that it had anything to do with comic books, or else I probably wouldn't have much any thought into weither I wanted to see it or not. I loved the movie. I thought it was fantastic, but the one thing I over heard from audience members, as we all left, "I didn't really like it. It was too different." I actually heard that phrase a few different times that night. Were these people just upset that the trailer didn't consist of revealations. I'm just surprised that so many liked the Sixth Sense, when it didn't say that Bruce Willis was dead during the trailer.
           Every movie doesn't need stunning a plot twist to be good, but if it does have one, don't show it in the trailer. Let the trailer be a setup for the movie. Perhaps make it a prologue that sets up the main conflict of the movie. At least most of the movies that are getting ruined, really suck ass. If there were any really good movies getting ruined, I might end up doing something other than ramble semi-coherently on my little web sight.